The Golden Cockroach
Symbols in mirror are larger than they appear.
Amidst the apocalypse, I’ve decided to figure out the energy of money.
In synchronicity and Jungian thought, the unconscious speaks to us through signs and symbols. Our inner world is alive and much larger than the physical brain compartment.
Meaning that when you are wanting to heal an emotional wound, your unconscious will give you signs and symbols throughout life, and repeat patterns and relationships, until you get the message.
So I made the conscientious choice that everything I see from now on has to do with money, my relationship with it, and what it has to teach me so that I can attract more, and not live in fear of the future.
Enter the cockroach stage right
I was asleep and I woke up for a split second to turn, only to find a cockroach on my window.
“Be gone, Satan!” - I yelped
I got up, grabbed the deadliest weapon I could find, my flip flops, and whacked the beast!
Only to miss and have the thing fall on the floor and run under my bed.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
Well now I have to move.
I started packing my bags, and messaging my family good bye.
I couldn’t lay back down. All I kept thinking about was that thing crawling around on my head!
So there I am, standing on my bed, flip flops at the ready, just watching and waiting, like a cockroach sniper.
It was 2am, my lids were heavy, but I stood my ground.
Finally I see the creepy crawler on the door of my closet, I step forward and whack! I killed it. Victory is mine! See you in hell!
I was able to lay back down and fall asleep.
When signs are much bigger than they seem
The cockroach was in my mind most of the next day. Mainly because I was still grossed out, and partly because I remembered my choice, “everything has to do with money”.
The unconscious speaks to us in symbols, and the symbol is simply a portal, an entryway. Symbols are a physical representation of a psychic message, leading our conscience to something deeper and larger that needs healing.
So that night I was journaling about what happened.
What does a cockroach represent?
Well, they’re dirty and gross.
Did I create an environment that allows dirty and gross things to come in?
Well… damn it, yes. When dealing with depression, one does not always have energy to do much, especially house chores. Dust settles, dishes and laundry pile up, and while I’m not on the brink of being featured in Hoarders, my home could use some love, as could I.
So there, we pinpointed how a cockroach could have been attracted to this environment. But what does the environment represent?
Well, I’m not living up to my potential. Our space is a physical symptom of an emotional manifestation. If I don’t believe deep down that I deserve better, than I won’t act as if I deserve better. If I feel like shit about myself and life (read my last grumpy blog entry) then how can I expect to live in a place, and act as someone that I don’t feel shitty about?
So now the cockroach starts to represent my lack of discipline, and how I view myself, and what I deserve. Correction! What I Think I deserve.
Now the real work begins. I get to move forward in my life making decisions that align with who I deserve to be.
Did you notice how the cockroach didn’t teach me about money, but more about self worth?
A part of me, when I decided to assign all symbols to money, I half expected to receive a dream or a tarot reading saying, in a booming God-like voice, “Goooooo do this thiiiiing and this will bring you mooooooney and fortuuuuuune”. I was expecting specific guidance.
When you’re on this path that everything is a sign and a lesson, you have to be open to what the lesson actually is.
I’m not saying that the cockroach revealed the secret of the Universe, but it’s a good start to my money journey, and what it has to teach me.
I showed me the door to self-worth, and isn’t that totally linked to money?
So I will continue to assign my symbols as money messages and keep going on this journey.
I know life has a lot more to teach, just hoping for less roaches and more cock.
With much love and tarot magick,
Icaro
Do you have an area of your life you want to figure out? Money is the theme of today, but it could be relationships, discipline, food issues, anything you can think of.
My suggestion for you is to choose one, and attribute signs and symbols to it.
I was apprehensive at first because there are many things I’d like to improve. One at a Time will take me a lifetime.
But I am a big believer in THE WAY YOU DO SOMETHING IS THE WAY YOU DO EVERYTHING.
If you procrastinate on house chores, you will procrastinate on anything that doesn’t give you pleasure, that includes hidden aspects too.
So choosing one topic is more of an entryway to the other topics as well. It’s the ripple effect.
Tarot Symbols
Tarot and Oracle cards are filled with symbols. Now, they won’t always match the symbol in got in a dream, for example, but they will add to it. You’re not swapping one symbol for another. You’re adding the meanings together, like pieces of a puzzle, until you see the big picture forming.
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